Why are you so angry?
I don’t get it. Last week, I reminded readers that this newspaper wants to hear all views and doesn’t discriminate based on ideology. A couple of conservatives (who I respectfully interact with via email on lots of issues) want to express their opinion on these pages.
I can’t wait to see the work. I’ve always said, and believe, it’s less about the idea and more about engagement and building bridges.
But then some were, well, really upset. They called me names and wrote less than nice things. I can tell an email subject line that starts with “You’re stupid” isn’t going to be pleasant. Doesn’t bother me. You don’t belong in journalism if you don’t have skin as thick as rubber.
I simply don’t understand that some people are so entrenched in their beliefs that they can’t even consider the possibility that another point of view exists. I’m not talking about who’s right and who’s wrong. Just an exchange.
Here’s an example: I believe we need to reinstate the assault weapons ban. A couple of you who disagree have engaged in meaningful email discussions in which we’ve exchanged views. I’m not interested in a victory. I want to know why you think the opposite point of view — that banning assault weapons won’t help solve mass killings — is as legitimate as mine.
There are all sorts of theories on conservative anger. It could be they believe a liberal media ridicule their ideas and values. They’re becoming increasingly anxious about social changes (more minorities, more integration, falling incomes) they can’t control. Polling shows white Republicans feel or fear they’re the real target of discrimination, worry about their place in society, and believe America has lost its Christian values.
It’s far too simplistic to note that white men still control most of the power and income in the country. The people that tend to be angry have the type of societal and financial concerns that result in anxiety over how they fit in a changing America.
I recognize that anxiety is very real.
So I started this column asking for help, and now I’ll make the offer.
I’m looking for a group of conservatives who wants to participate in a video call to talk about the issues that matter to them. I will not have an agenda. I figure if those on the call come with one discussion topic of their choosing, we can have a fair and respectful exchange.
And I’ll write about it.
During the video call, I will not call you stupid, I will not call you names, and I will not ridicule you for your beliefs.
I just want to hear what you have to say and understand why you believe what you do. Will I ask questions? Sure. Might I push back on some assertions? Maybe. But discussions aren’t one-sided. They’re meant to understand all points of view. Neither side can do that if discussion turns into a monologue.
Besides, I wouldn’t be surprised if there were disagreements among the people on the call because not all Republicans and conservatives think alike.
There’s only one rule. We will be civil. No yelling or being offensive.
No “You’re stupid.”
I’ll do the same with Democrats and then, at some point, blend the groups to have a back-and-forth on issues they care about. (That should be fun).
We talk about trying to make a difference in our discourse. You might read this and dismiss it as folly, but I can’t do anything about that. So I’m looking for five people who want to get together for one hour via video one evening to talk about what they care about.
Who says yes?
THANK YOU: Thank you to everyone who contacted me following last week’s column who wanted to engage with a question or comments. I promise that, over the next few weeks, I’ll get them all answered.
Ray Marcano’s column appears on these pages every Sunday. You can send him questions or comments to raymarcanoddn@gmail.com
About the Author