Latest kitchen gadget has this cook fit to be fried

D.L. Stewart and his quarantine facial hair. CONTRIBUTED

D.L. Stewart and his quarantine facial hair. CONTRIBUTED

Kitchens have come along way since the days when anything we cared to cook could be handled by a stove and a cast iron frying pan. But today, in or within walking distance of our kitchen, there are two refrigerators, an electric range, a microwave range, a mixer, a toaster, a toaster oven, a panini griller, a food processor, a mini food processor, a blender, a submersion blender, a coffee maker, an espresso maker, a pair of crock pots and an Amazon Echo so we can ask Alexa how to use all those things.

In other words, during an extended power failure, we’d pretty much starve to death.

Our latest kitchen addition is an air fryer, which is a Father’s Day present from my wife. Probably in retaliation for the mixer I gave her for Mother’s Day.

Air fryers, according to the brochure that accompanied mine, are “essentially small countertop convection ovens.” Which makes me wonder exactly how often it’s going to get used. For years we’ve had a microwave with a convention setting, an oven with convention capability and I still don’t know how to use either one.

And the word “small” is a relative term. To make room for it on the countertop, we had to move the toaster to where the mixer was, the mixer to where the coffee maker was and the coffee maker to the garage on a shelf next to the panini maker.

All of which I’m sure will be worth it, because one of the advantages of an air fryer is that it fries some foods without requiring much, or any, oil. One of the disadvantages, on the other hand, is that the actual cooking surface is limited in size. But it’s definitely plenty big for those times when you crave a French fry.

And I’m sure that some of the recipes in the magazine that came with the air fryer will be . .. memorable. Although a number of them, I noticed, involve kale. My feeling about kale is that it’s only suitable for goats. So I would have to take the kale, feed it to a goat and then air fry the goat.

Unfortunately, there are no recipes in the magazine for crispy fried goat. But there are plenty of others, including Crispy Tofu, Tahini Black Bean Fritters and Tandoori Turkey Breast. Although again, because of it’s limited cooking surface, the Tandoori Turkey Breast would have to come from a turkey who wore a training bra.

So for Sunday breakfast I think I’ll air-fry Poached Egg Avocado Smashed Toast, accompanied by Everything Bagel Avocado Fries. If my wife wants coffee with that I’ll have to go out to the garage.

Contact this columnist at dlstew_2000@yahoo.com.

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