“Let’s go out back, it’s nice out today,” Ben Lavelle said.
With his parents, Brian and Julie, joining him and his visitor, he led the way past the kitchen where a two-page, hand-written letter from University of Dayton football coach Trevor Andrews was tacked up on the wall.
“In this day and age, who does something like that?” Brian said appreciatively. “It’d be much easier to just shoot us a text and say good luck, but he took the time to write a thoughtful letter. That means a lot.
“His letter’s an inspiration to all of us.”
The Lavelles took seats at a table on the patio, beneath the big screen TV where Ben often has watched Dayton Flyers football games this season.
But he said his parents don’t join him out there for those Saturday sessions.
“I yell at the TV too much,” he admitted with a laugh. “I’m too loud and noisy for anybody else.”
An All-Ohio, Division I first team punter/placekicker when he helped lead St. Edward High in Lakewood to back-to-back state titles in 2021 and 2022, Ben is now a punter at UD. But as the TV and letter suggest, his participation in Flyers’ football has been done from afar this season.
Except for last weekend when he made an unexpected return visit to UD.
Although he has yet to play a down for the Flyers — thanks to two straight redshirt seasons — he was given a conquering hero’s welcome when he surprised his teammates and suddenly walked onto the practice field on the eve of the big game with Davidson last Saturday at Welcome Stadium.
He got the kind of full-throated response you’d expect would be reserved for UD’s most-celebrated athletes, guys like the NFL’s Adam Troutman and the NBA’s Obi Toppin.
But the day after UD’s 18-10 victory over Saint Francis in the Aug. 31 season opener at Welcome Stadium, Lavelle left the team and went back to his home in Westlake to begin his battle with Stage 2 testicular cancer that had spread to his lungs.
His out-of-the-blue diagnosis — a “real gut punch” to the family Brian said — had come a few days earlier.
Before the severity was known, there had been some fleeting thought that he might play this season and begin his treatment in early December. He’d already sat out the season before and then in January he’d undergone surgery to repair a torn labrum in his hip that allowed him to move again without pain.
After finally being cleared to begin kicking again on June 30th, he’d gone to Naples, Fla., to train at Kornblue Kicking, the highly respected football camp run by Brandon Kornblue, the kicker on the Michigan Wolverines 1997 national championship team.
“We were super jazzed that he was going to get back to football after missing a year,” Brian said.
But when the extent of Ben’s cancer was revealed, there was no more debate.
“I asked the doctor how bad it was, and he was like, ‘It’s bad…It’s bad,’” Brian said.
Julie nodded: “He said, ‘If it was my child, I’d treat it right now.’”
And Ben understood what was at stake: “I was given an option, but I was like ‘This is my life…I shouldn’t play with it.’”
Thanks to extra efforts by his UD professors, Ben was able to stay enrolled in school and took his classes remotely. Some profs taught him via Zoom sessions and one — Erica Neuman — drove all the way to their Cleveland suburb and proctored a test for him at a local library.
Although given a medical redshirt, Ben has remained part of the team through efforts that were just as extraordinary as those shown by the UD professors.
Andrews, the other coaches, the coaches’ wives, Ben’s teammates and some of their parents have reached out to the Lavelle family with continuous support.
There have been numerous text messages from teammates, football staffers and even athletics director Neil Sullivan.
Andrews said UD president Eric Spina has inquired about Ben.
The team began wearing red wristbands that proclaim, “Lavelle Strong” and include a flexed arm with bulging biceps.
“When we watch the games, we see players on the sidelines wearing those red wristbands,” Brian said. “That means a lot.”
When Andrews sent the family some of the rubber bracelets, he added that letter that began:
“As a show of support and brotherhood, the team, coaches and football support staff will be wearing these wristbands the rest of the 2024 season.”
He then said Ben’s diagnosis was “a lesson in perspective to us all.”
Andrews mentioned Ben’s growth over the past year and how the “fortitude” he’s shown in the past will help him “conquer this battle.”
“Until he returns to the team, he (and the rest of your family) will continue to be in our thoughts and prayers,” the coach concluded.
And he said if he can help them “navigate the coming challenges,” he wanted them to call and gave them his cell phone number.
“In your hopes and dreams you want people to be that good, but never in a million years did we expect all this,” Brian said. “We truly appreciate what they have done for Ben and us. We have mad respect for the coaches and professors. The support has been spectacular.
“I told Coach Andrews if they ever need someone to cheer on the school and the football program, we’d all be cheerleaders for them.”
As Andrews reflected on the response of the UD community — and how it has buoyed Ben and his family — the emotion welled up in him and his voice momentarily broke before he continued:
“His dad did say, ‘If you ever need me to talk to a recruit’s parents about the University of Dayton and the support you get when things aren’t going your way, give them my number.
“I want them to know what UD has done for us.’”
‘I was stunned’
Ben got college offers from Dayton, Marist and some Division II schools. His only connection to the Flyers was that his uncle, Brian’s brother, Dan, had graduated from UD.
More importantly he knew a roster opening had developed when one of the Flyers veteran kickers had transferred to Toledo.
But he needed to develop more on and off the field Andrews said. That prompted the initial redshirt and then came the injury that worsened over the year as he practiced but could not play.
“By the end I couldn’t lift my leg onto the bed. I had to get help,” Ben said. “After practice sometimes I couldn’t move and would just sit in my desk chair for a couple of hours.”
After successful surgery and then the Kornblue camp, he was pumped for this season and Andrews said it would have been a battle between returning punter Logan Forcum and him.
But while playing Wiffle Ball before he was to report to UD, Ben said he was hit in the groin when a bat flew out of someone’s hand during a swing. Afterward, he noticed a lump on his testicle.
“I didn’t think anything of it, but the next week I had a doctor’s appointment, and I mentioned what had happened,” he said. “He looked and said it didn’t seem right and referred me to a urologist. He thought it might just be a build-up of fluids.
Ben said he hadn’t shared the situation with his parents — partly out of embarrassment — but finally confided to his dad about the upcoming urologist’s visit. Thinking it was routine they didn’t mention it to Julie.
“I got more bloodwork and an ultrasound and later that day the doctor called and said I had cancer,” Ben said. “I was like ‘Huh? I just sat there. I didn’t know what to say. I was stunned.”
The news floored Brian as well and that’s when he told Julie.
The doctor told them there was an opening in the surgical schedule and Ben could have the lump removed five days later.
Less than two weeks after the surgery Ben reported to UD’s camp and, after taking a few days off so the incision could heal, he was back kicking.
“Then came the results from further blood tests and a CT scan,” Julie said. “His cancer had spread — which is not uncommon — and the doctor said he best, most effective way to address it was through extensive chemotherapy.
“Brian and I were in the oncologist’s office when he gave Ben the news on a video call down in Dayton. I tried to stay off camera so Ben wouldn’t see I was bawling my eyes out.”
The news came right before the Flyers opener and Andrews addressed the entire team about the situation.
Ben was in uniform on the sidelines that first game and his parents were in the stands.
A week later he began his chemotherapy regimen at University Hospital.
He’s now finished two of his three chemo regimens.
“He goes for one full week, several hours in the chair each day getting his chemo, and then he has two weeks off, except for going in each Monday for a couple of tests,” Julie said. “Hopefully, he’s beginning the third and final one this Monday.
Before one of his first sessions he was sitting in the chemo chair, hooked to an IV, when he got a photo from Andrews, who was wearing his red wristband.
Julie said it was perfect timing:
“That really lifted him when he needed it.”
A punter with purpose
Several of the Flyers’ players check in regularly with Ben.
He and the other specialists have a regular group chat and on Fridays he said he and wide/receiver kick returner Gavin Lochow talk about the next day’s game.
And during warmups just before the game each Saturday, senior snapper Austin Yeager FaceTimes him so he can have a final update on the team.
“From a parent’s standpoint, that’s pretty super cool,” Brian said. “Those guys are getting ready on the field, and they still have time to think of Ben and say, ‘We wish you were here.’”
And last Saturday he was.
After having low white blood cell counts a week prior, he got some special medication and his numbers were back closer to normal, so he made the three-hour drive to Dayton by himself.
“We felt it was important for him to be able to do this without Mom and Dad hanging around,” Brian said.
It was good for Ben’s mental health and the team’s as well, Andrews said.
Only Andrews knew he was coming, and he kept it secret.
Ben stayed in the press box before the start of Friday’s practice and then hid behind the bleachers as warmups finished. Only then were the team captains informed of his presence.
The Flyers end those warm-up session with what they call “5 Quicks,” basically jumping jacks led by a designated team member or maybe a visiting alum.
He said that’s when senior center Dylan DeMaison called out his name to lead the 5 Quicks.
“When Ben walked out, the guys went nuts,” Andrews said.
“He’s lost all his hair, and he looked a little puffy — (Ben said he’s gained 13 pounds, thanks, in part, to Mom’s cooking) — but otherwise he was the same.”
Except he seemed to be smiling more.
“I wanted them to see that smile,” Ben said. “I wanted to show them that all’s good. I might have lost my hair, but nothing else. I’m still the same guy. "
He is and, then again, he is not,
“In a weird sort of way, he’s become an even better person,” Brian said.
He’s a punter with a purpose.
“I think he has a good platform now,” Brian said. “Since he’s been home, he’s been going to his brother Will’s soccer games, and he’s been helping the kickers on the St. Ed’s team.”
He’s giving the St. Ed’s athletes a lesson in how to deal with unexpected things happening to your body and the UD players are learning from him, too.
“He’s letting them know, when you notice something, don’t keep it to yourself just because it’s not easy to talk about,” Brian said. “This is curable, but if he had ignored it, we’d be in a completely different situation now and it might not be good.”
Julie agreed: “We just learned how common this is for young men ages 19 to 23. It was shocking. But it’s not something our pediatrician or anyone ever talked about. It’s something that needs to be shared.
“I’ve been impressed how Ben’s handled the whole thing. He’s shown toughness and still managed to keep that smile on his face every day.”
Brian said several people have asked him, “How can Ben still be smiling?”
“He has a never give up attitude. He has goals and aspirations that he wants to achieve, and he can’t do that if he is wallowing in self-pity. He knows that others are worse off than him.
“He believes God has a plan for him.
“He truly believes in himself and that he will beat this.”
About the Author